Counting Down and Up
Reading obituaries regularly is new to me. To be completely honest, I rarely read the whole thing. I zero in on two specific pieces of data relevant to me: Who? How old?
The “who” answers the obvious question, “Did I know this person?” With few exceptions the answer has been “no” for which I am grateful, and selfishly relieved. It’s not someone l will miss, and, as the old joke goes, “I’m relieved to know it’s not me!”
Even so, it is the second data point that really gets my attention. Reading “how old” sets off an autonomic calculation in my brain:
Deceased’s Age (DA) – My Age (MA) = Possible Years Ahead (PYA)
So, when I read that John Smith “shuffled off his mortal coil” at 76 my PYA score is a scant seven years. If by virtue of a righteous life, saintly John passed at 89 my score expands to a more comfortable 20 years.
I do not remember consciously deciding to start this math-centric obituary reading. Perhaps it really does come with age. As the Lord wills, 2022 will mark my 70th trip around the sun.
But, once conscious of the habit, I had to ask myself “Why am I doing this?” It was then I realized there are two ways to understand this phenomenon: counting-down and counting-up.
“Counting-down” came naturally to me because the hard truth is the years ahead are far fewer than those behind, righteous life or not. Ugh! Calculating single-digit PYAs brought on a maudlin wistfulness. Will I get to see my grandkids’ bar/bat mitzvah, college graduations, weddings…? How many years of retirement will my health permit me to enjoy? How will I survive if my wife goes before me? You get the idea.
Thinking like this may be natural but it was unfruitful. It was a short trip from figuring my PYA to experiencing enervation and discouragement. Either apathy, “Why bother?” or anxiety “What can I do?” immobilized me.
Why? Because by “counting-down” I put me at the center of my life and pushed our eternal God to the periphery!
Thankfully, “counting up” is the antidote to what ailed me.
“Counting-up” gets God back into the center of my thinking. How so? It sets the shocking scarcity of my PYA in the context of God’s eternality and unfailing lovingkindness. It helps me embrace the days ahead as precious, not for their number, but for the opportunities to live wisely in response to who God is, His provision and eternality. It changes the focus of my life from “more” to “better.”
Have you started playing obituary math?
Are you counting down or up?
Just remember, it is of great value only when you count in the right direction no matter your age. May Moses’ prayer be ours every day God gives us:
As for the days of our life, they contain seventy years, Or if due to strength, eighty years, Yet their pride is but labor and sorrow; For soon it is gone and we fly away. Who understands the power of Your anger And Your fury, according to the fear that is due You? So teach us to number our days, That we may present to You a heart of wisdom. Do return, O Lord; how long will it be? And be sorry for Your servants. O satisfy us in the morning with Your lovingkindness, That we may sing for joy and be glad all our days. – Psalm 90:10-14 NASB
Written by Dan, LIFE Board Chair
What practical steps can you take today to turn your focus heavenward?
Whether you are 17 or 70, what is God calling you to do with your remaining years?
A common Jewish blessing is “ahd meah v’esreem” – as in “(may you live) to 120,” which was Moses’ age when God called him home. We may wish for long life, for ourselves and others. But if TODAY is the day you enter eternity, are you “prepared to meet your God” (Amos 4:12)? We’d love to talk with you if you’re unsure. Call 708-418-0020 or “live chat” at www.insearchofshalom.com.